The Examined Life, Part 2
Some of you may remember receiving an e-mail late last year that started out, “So…what did you learn? Er…Uh…”
That question, asked “out of the blue,” really caught me off guard! But oh, my, what a Very Valuable Question.
(Thank you, Carrie!)
So I went back and made that “Part 1” - and thus THIS Part 2 - in an annual series. Winter is a time for quiet, rest, and reflection, although our modern world works against it. Ask your friends if things calm down for them this time of year, and they are apt to say, “Well, I WISH it would, but I’m still SOOOOO BUSY.”
So. Reflection One:
Does My Life EVER Slow Down?
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Does My Life EVER Slow Down? 〰️
Last winter, I don’t think it did. Other things in nature slow down. Trees lose their leaves, and they rest. The strawberries, comfrey, and chamomile in my garden? Sleeping under the snow. My older chickens aren’t laying much right now…they’re resting for the winter, and they won’t crank back up until the days lengthen.
This isn’t rocket science, folks. But it IS important. Our modern, constantly engaged, cell-phones-in-the-bedroom-culture militates against rest and reflection. The unfortunate but obvious by-product is that we rarely rest and reflect. And, as Socrates so famously said, “The Unexamined Life is Not Worth Living.”
Can we just acknowledge that busy-ness is a choice we make? Do we allow ourselves to be sucked in, or do we take a stand and say NO? Do we teach our kids to Go, Go, Go (with Spotify in their ear buds on the way); or do we lead by example, showing them that it’s GOOD to take time to be QUIET? Even (gasp!) BORED?
“For thus saith the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel; In returning and rest shall ye be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength: and ye would not.” Isaiah 30:15.
Quiet self-examination is one of the most important things a person can do. When we don’t examine ourselves, ask ourselves, “What have I done…and why?" we are almost certain to continue doing what we’ve always done, no matter the result. Unfortunately, the result isn’t always good. We thoughtlessly succumb to impulse buys we can’t afford, fly off the handle at the slightest provocation, and rush around putting out one fire after another.
I’m an type-A personality, and my tendency is to feel guilty if I’m not DOING, and doing A LOT. But if I don’t rachet that DOING back a bit, I end up exhausted, frustrated, and angry. Oh, my poor family!
So what have I learned in 2025? I have learned the way to get more done is to put LESS on my planner. Examples? I’ve learned that Mondays are NOT a good day to schedule a lot of to-do’s, because Mondays get filled up anyway with “all the stuff” that didn’t get done over the weekend. I’ve learned that Fridays are a terrible day to make cheese, because about the time I should be slowing down to prepare our sourdough pizza, sipping my weekly glass of homemade wine, and harmonizing with Brendan as he sings and plays his guitar, I’ve got to finish the darned cheese!
NOTE TO SELF: Keep Mondays clear and make cheese on Tuesdays. Sing with Brendan on Fridays! Done!
Reflection Two:
Living With Loss on the Homestead
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Living With Loss on the Homestead 〰️
This’ll refer back to another event many of you will remember from earlier this year: Living with Loss on the Homestead. In case you missed it, a shipment of 150 chicks was delayed, and by the time the little things got to me, some were already dead, others were unresponsive, and within a week I lost a third of that flock.
What could I have done differently? First, let me admit that I don’t LIKE taking blame for things. But one of my very favorite expressions is, “It’s the management, Stupid!” It sounds SO negative, and it is SO positive. It drives me to action, instead of allowing me to wallow whimpering in victimhood. What COULD I have done differently? While I could not have made the postal service work any faster, there were a few things I could have done.
When asked, I could have refused to accept chicks shipped over the weekend.
I could have offered to meet a hatchery rep halfway or even driven the 2 hours to pick them up.
I could have strewn feed ALL over the floor directly under the feet of the chicks when they arrived. This I honestly did not know before. I learned later that some of those chicks could have been saved if they hadn’t had to walk for feed. Even for the ones that SEEMED okay, walking 2 feet for feed after such a trip was “2 feet too far.” So now whenever I get new chicks, even if they are bright and perky, you’d better bet those chicks have feed EVERYWHERE! They’re WALKING in the stuff! (Yes, they’ll poop in it, too, but don’t worry. Contrary to popular opinion, chickens do NOT eat their own poop! One peck at it when they’re babies cures them for life.)
But there was a positive side to this experience, a thankfulness that I was the one who had to deal with the problem. In my reflections on this painful event, I asked each of you,
“Why are YOU here, with The Cluckery? It’s because each of us, in our own way, is taking responsibility for our own health, our own food. What happened here, at The Cluckery, happens there, with “somebody else.” I just don’t have to see it. And how would “somebody else,” maybe a factory farm, handle it? I don’t know. I just don’t know.”
Well, I recently found out what “somebody else” (i.e., a factory farm) does when they’ve got a lot of chickens to put down, either due to disease or, as happened during Covid, because there aren’t enough people working at the slaughterhouses to handle them. They kill them via USDA- and AMVA-approved methods of shutting down their ventilation systems, “foaming” (spraying a water-based foam over the chickens so that they smother,) or “gassing” with carbon dioxide.
Yes, you read that right. And yes, I felt sick when I learned it. And no, I didn’t quite believe it the first time I read it. But just a little more research has confirmed it, and I will send you my sources if you ask me.
And before I - or you - get all up in arms, realize 1) these folks are sort of “stuck” in a large system with large problems; and 2) not ALL large farms use those methods! I spoke to a man earlier this year who pastures THOUSANDS of chickens. Moves them every day, like I do…only he moves thousands to my hundred and fifty. Unfortunately, a few of his chickens were diagnosed with Avian Flu, so a government agency forced him to depopulate his entire flock. It was absolutely horrible, but this conscientious Christian man and his entire team of employees took DAYS to personally kill thousands of birds humanely. That sounds like an oxymoron, I know, but the man wasn’t allowed to let them live or try to cure them, and so he did the best he could. So let’s not paint ALL “big ag” with that broad brush! Can you imagine what those people went through?
Knowing this, though, makes me SO thankful those little chicks came to ME! I can’t change the world, and I can’t change CAFO’s, but I can steward my own corner conscientiously, and I can give YOU an option you can live with!
Reflection Three
I Actually Love People!
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I Actually Love People! 〰️
What? I love people? Wow. I didn’t know this about myself. You’ll have to excuse me for that, but I worked in Human Resources in the auto industry for 7 years. Therefore, I very reasonably thought that I didn’t much like people! 😂
But then I started selling pastured poultry. I started giving “farm tours and tea,” even doing interviews with some of my customers, finding out what makes them tick. (And if I haven’t called YOU yet, just you wait. 🤩) Why DO people buy my chicken? I’m not conveniently located. And, after all, my chicken isn’t cheap, and it shouldn’t be. Local, organic feed and daily, intensive, personal management don’t fit in the Bargain Bin category.
You guys have so freely shared your stories, your WHY’s. And I have loved, loved, loved getting to know you. I’m sure some of it comes down to that “like-mindedness” factor. I’m here because some of my kids had health issues, and we had to find a better way. You’re here because your kids were sick, or you were vaccine-injured or reacted to antibiotics, and grocery store meat isn’t an option. You’re allergic to the chlorine in grocery store chicken, or you were forever changed by Super-Size Me and Food, Inc. You don’t mind paying more when it means supporting a local farm, knowing that we in turn support OUR local community.
So thank you all for teaching me that I really DO love people, after all. You have just been WONDERFUL, and I look forward to getting to know you more deeply over the years.
Reflection Four
Growth Begins at the End of Your Comfort Zone
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Growth Begins at the End of Your Comfort Zone 〰️
Ouch. I LIKE my comfort zone. It’s so…comfy!
Call it self-defense, call it avoidance, call it whatever you like. I’ve always been a little afraid of things. Some of you who ONLY know me through The Cluckery are shocked to learn that I am very shy. Several times over the last few years people suggested that I should sell my chicken, or my sourdough bread, or my canned goods; or even teach classes. Who, Me? Oh, I’ll give it away for free, but who would BUY from me? As soon as folks said those things, the walls went up. Walls in the form of excuses for why it wouldn’t work.
But (another favorite saying) “an excuse is the skin of a reason stuffed with a lie.”
AMEN.
Those reasons it wouldn’t work were really just covering up fear.
So what happened to change me? There were several pieces to the puzzle.
My sister Caroline, an incredible homeschool mom, piano teacher, and now tutor, was my inspiration. She didn’t say anything to any of us. She just decided tutoring out of her own home was something she could do: and she took the bull by the horns and did the thing. She made phone calls to a local school, put herself out there ,and she Did The Thing.
I have always tried to emulate the Virtuous Woman of Proverbs 31. Yet I would feel so uncomfortable when I read verse 18, “She perceiveth that her merchandise is good,” or verse 24, “She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.” This woman was a BUSINESS WOMAN! She cared well for her home and her family, but she didn’t HIDE in her home. And I didn’t measure up to that. I worked hard, but I HID.
This was probably the biggest one: The Scriptural story of the talents. In Matthew 25:24-29, the wicked and slothful servant hid his lord’s talent in the earth, because, he said, “I was afraid.” Suffice it to say, the lord of that servant wasn’t buying it! That man lost his talent and a whole lot more besides.
I’m still afraid. Do you have ANY idea how hard it is for ME to try to sell? To contact a potential customer? How sick I feel at times when I send out a sales launch? Maybe I shouldn’t admit that. But what I am learning is to “Do It Scared.” And I Do It Scared, every day. And then when you guys tell me the difference my chicken makes in your lives, it’s all worth it. I’m humbled and honored at the same time.
So the lesson here? Do It Scared. I “mess up” all the time. But I’m not trying to mess up, and I trust that God - and you - know that. May I be found faithful, that I might hear on the Last Day, “Well done, good and faithful servant…enter thou into the joy of thy lord.”
Conclusion:
Obviously, this is only a small sampling of the thoughts that go into reflecting on the past year! Ain’t nobody needs to know EVERYTHING! 😁But I hope this little foray into Behind the Scenes of The Cluckery spurs you to do your OWN reflections. And as I said earlier this year, “if I’m going to raise and process animals for you, I have a responsibility to you. How can you trust me, if you don’t know how I act when times are good and when times are bad?”
(Need Chicken? Click here to order yours today!)